walking in my shoes

I feel like I'm surrounded by idiots. Like I'm the only smart person in a world of stupidity.

I know it's not true and I know that I feel this way only because I'm so insanely tired that I hardly know my own name, but still... sometimes the dumbness of other people really amazes me.

healthy memories

I'm having pineapple&orangejuice. I've only had that once this year. Before that it was probably ten years ago and that was in Spain. My family used to have a house there (well more apartment, but free apartment with a garden - kinda strange) so we spent about a month every summer in that lovely warm, beautiful country. I was really sad when they sold it and I haven't been to Spain since - think that was about six or seven years ago. Maybe I should go there this summer. See how much it's changed.
Or maybe I'll just stay in Sweden. Our summers are somewhat special; they usually always contain quite alot of rain - and if it doesn't rain then the temperature tends to rise to above 30 degrees. Not too bad, I suppose.

I don't really know what I want to write here, but I think the fact that a friend of mine is going south for a week triggered some lost longing inside my head. Maybe I'll just kidnap my sister - she's always up for that.

Save the rain forest!

I have an insane amount of hair. It's just stupid. I outta shave it all off.

bring it on

My right big toe hurts like hell. You know when the nail...? Yeah, no need to go into details, but I'm suspecting that I'll soon be physically challenged because of it. It just hurts so bad.

Every now and then people insult me. Most of them mean no harm when they do, but sometimes I wonder if they just don't think at all when they speak. Like the time a friend told me that I "demand attention". She explained it with something like "if you enter a room you make people speak to you". I didn't know that. I don't even like people.
Or when I heard that my friend thought I would run away and hide if we would get attacked. I wonder what kind of image I actually present to people.
The latest insult, however, actually cut me deeper. And I don't even think it was meant as one, but the person who uttered it certainly knew that it took. I'm reading a book and he asked me how it was. My answer to him was "brilliant" and he replied "ah so that means 'alright'". I know that we probably don't have the same taste in books, but for him to reply like that... It made me feel dumb. Like I'm an ignorant person who just doesn't know better.

And people wonder why I hate men...

dream on

I went to visit my parents last Saturday. I don't usually do that, but I was in a good mood and it turned out to be quite a good day. As I walked in their house, the house I've spent little over 21 years in and called 'home', I felt out of place. It felt smaller than it used to. I'm still the same size as I was when I moved out last year, my parents are still the same size and the house sure hasn't changed its size. Still... it felt slightly too small for me. Maybe I've just grown so much mentally by moving out that I just don't fit in there anymore... (Not that I want to fit in there.)

Women don't like me. They see my body and they see my smile and they decide that I'm something they don't like. But they don't know.
People think I'm silly for not drinking. For thinking that alcohol is just another drug. But they don't know.
I've heard that I'm ridiculous because I don't like the concept of birthday presents. But they don't know.
I don't know.
No one really knows.

priorities

If I get to keep my job I will do the following things:

1. Buy tickets to Roskilde.
2. Frame the cemetary photoes.
3. Repaint my kitchen.

I'm gonna do them in this order and I would really like to know if I get to keep my fucking job or not. Fucking suitpeople. (English is not the best language to curse on.)

cursed

"You'll have to finish this. It poured down into my underwear."

I deserved it. I know that most women who use this line don't deserve it, but I really did.

Welcome to the Quality Control. In between paints we like to mess with each other and today H2 poured water down my back. Not a big deal really to be honest, I've had worse, but I just don't like being wet. And I don't like having to walk around in my cardigan under my workrobe when the temperature is near the melting point.

In the summer of 2006 I got a bucket of water (five litres) turned upside down over me when I was sitting by the computer. This wasn't as bad, but I can kinda feel that bucket coming slowly towards me. God knows I do deserve it. And God knows that vengeance is sweet and juicy.