When do you know for sure if you're in love? People say "when you are, then you'll know", but still... How can you be really sure? Is it the joy you feel everytime you see the person? The thrill you experience every time you meet? The sadness that fills you every time you part? Or is it something completely different? The safe, warm feeling that no matter how shitty life it, you won't have to go through it alone? That, when the day is over, someone will be there waiting for you? Or is it all of this? Mixed up to a messy ball rolling around in your head. The happiness, sorrow, anger, pain, dizzyness, sillyness and all those other emotions that all flood you.
I've heard people saying that "there's no greater feeling than love" and I might have to agree on that. I just wish I didn't have to.
Wednesday, 12 March 2008
Friday, 7 March 2008
*sigh*
You know that feeling of despair, sadness and deafeat that sometimes creep slowly up on you? I think I have that feeling. Or at least a part of it. You wake up in the morning and instead of feeling "yes, a new wonderful day!", you feel "if I pull this cover over my head then I can sleep the day away because I don't want to face it". Instead of sun shining outside you see clouds gathering and even if the wind blows - you don't really feel it on your face. People are too loud, too annoying and have too many problems for you to really care. Because you don't care about anything. Not even yourself. Apathy. Apathy for yourself, your fellow people, the world, everything. Live or die? What's the difference since you're not mentally present anyway? You wake up, have your breakfast, go to work, go home and go to bed. Every day. And then you start wondering what the point of it all is? Instead of seeing the joy of a silly joke or a stupid article, you find yourself thinking "what I am doing? Why is my life like this? It used to be..." and then you make yourself feel bad. When you start to think about how it used to be. Things cease to be for a reason - but when you're having a mental breakdown you don't realise that. The world stops spinning for you, but for everyone else it's still a wonderful place.
Yes, that feeling of despair, sadness and defeat is a terrible feeling. But I really do think that it will get better. Things will always work themselves out. Maybe not to the solution you wanted, and maybe not as fast as you wanted, but they will. I believe that. Because I have to. And to be honest... I do feel a bit better already. :-)
Yes, that feeling of despair, sadness and defeat is a terrible feeling. But I really do think that it will get better. Things will always work themselves out. Maybe not to the solution you wanted, and maybe not as fast as you wanted, but they will. I believe that. Because I have to. And to be honest... I do feel a bit better already. :-)
Wednesday, 23 May 2007
Morning madness.
Life's pretty good at the moment... I mean, sure it's 6:57 a.m. - but I still feel that this is gonna be a really good day. It might be the fact that the sun is shining outside, that it's not too cold or that I've just not fallen and hit my head against something yet (although there was that moment this morning when I felt like it was pretty darn close).
So what's the point of this blog? Well, nothing really, but since I can't access my normal blogsite at work (because some nice little person in Germany decided to turn off everything to do with "social networking" and "games") I'm gonna spread my "wisdom" here instead. And maybe mix some WoW-stuff with some real life-stuff. And yes, I'm terribly bored too.
That outta sum it up for now - seeya later (seems like it's gonna be a slow day at work...)
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
I was right. It's a slow day. It's now 7:50 and I've done almost nothing. Jeez...
Anyway... you know that word "addiction" - yes, terribly ugly word. That's what I've got for World of Warcraft. From the moment I started playing I knew that this is gonna mess me up, which is probably why I delayed the debut for a year and a half (my co-workers used to nag at me: 'Come on... start!'). Now, you probably get the idea that I sit at a pc all day and then get home and sit by a pc some more and you're almost right. But my job isn't about working with computers like technical support or something like that. Nope, I work in a laboratory. Sort of. (Not animal testing or anything like that - had to point that out.) I think I lost myself along the way here... ah, yes WoW. So now for the third best thing to actually playing WoW - thinking about it. (Number 2 is speaking about it but since none of the "Speedy Team"-contenstants I'm working with this week actually play the game, it's rather hard to talk about it. And every now and then I pretend to be a normal non-addicted person with a real life.)
Started the attunement questchain for Karazhan yesterday with Noita. Not really too hard, although we were both a bit "off" and I had some icecream cake to distract me from the screen. (Yes, I know that it's wrong to blame an innocent cake, but I'm gonna do it anyway.) Now we need to get into Shadow Labs and since I want the key for it, we need to do Sethekk Halls. And since we've barely done any OL-instances at all, maybe we'll start slowly... :-D
I also lvld my cooking a little and I think it's on 258 now or something - a tip if you don't wanna fish: Monster Omelet. (I am such a nerd...)
We're 20 active players in the guild (around 50 in total) and all are over lvl 50. That feels really good for not being one of those guilds who spam the general channel. We never recruit that way. Come to think of it - I don't really think we recruit at all... it's more of a "I-know-this-guy-and-he/she-is-really-good...". I, personally, believe this way to be better 'cause then you can keep the close bond between the guildmembers and there's not too much "who's this guy?". I also like for all the members to discuss the invites with the leader who're online at that time. Mostly because there might be a chance that someone in the guild knows this guy from before and knows something about this person that the inviter doesn't. (He might be a ninja-looter or whatever.) Of course, there are people in the guild who don't like this system - they think it's too "bossy" and they might be right. I might be a terrible control-freak! But the fact still stands - it's a )&"(/)O#/ good guild!
I just realised that I feel terribly sad about the people who read this and don't play WoW... sorry for all the WoW-stuff! I just had to get it out of my system!
Darkspear-EU for the win! (<--- Oh, my God... talk about pathetic... such a childish behaviour. I think I have to go away now.)
/Ajöken sa Löken
So what's the point of this blog? Well, nothing really, but since I can't access my normal blogsite at work (because some nice little person in Germany decided to turn off everything to do with "social networking" and "games") I'm gonna spread my "wisdom" here instead. And maybe mix some WoW-stuff with some real life-stuff. And yes, I'm terribly bored too.
That outta sum it up for now - seeya later (seems like it's gonna be a slow day at work...)
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
I was right. It's a slow day. It's now 7:50 and I've done almost nothing. Jeez...
Anyway... you know that word "addiction" - yes, terribly ugly word. That's what I've got for World of Warcraft. From the moment I started playing I knew that this is gonna mess me up, which is probably why I delayed the debut for a year and a half (my co-workers used to nag at me: 'Come on... start!'). Now, you probably get the idea that I sit at a pc all day and then get home and sit by a pc some more and you're almost right. But my job isn't about working with computers like technical support or something like that. Nope, I work in a laboratory. Sort of. (Not animal testing or anything like that - had to point that out.) I think I lost myself along the way here... ah, yes WoW. So now for the third best thing to actually playing WoW - thinking about it. (Number 2 is speaking about it but since none of the "Speedy Team"-contenstants I'm working with this week actually play the game, it's rather hard to talk about it. And every now and then I pretend to be a normal non-addicted person with a real life.)
Started the attunement questchain for Karazhan yesterday with Noita. Not really too hard, although we were both a bit "off" and I had some icecream cake to distract me from the screen. (Yes, I know that it's wrong to blame an innocent cake, but I'm gonna do it anyway.) Now we need to get into Shadow Labs and since I want the key for it, we need to do Sethekk Halls. And since we've barely done any OL-instances at all, maybe we'll start slowly... :-D
I also lvld my cooking a little and I think it's on 258 now or something - a tip if you don't wanna fish: Monster Omelet. (I am such a nerd...)
We're 20 active players in the guild (around 50 in total) and all are over lvl 50. That feels really good for not being one of those guilds who spam the general channel. We never recruit that way. Come to think of it - I don't really think we recruit at all... it's more of a "I-know-this-guy-and-he/she-is-really-good...". I, personally, believe this way to be better 'cause then you can keep the close bond between the guildmembers and there's not too much "who's this guy?". I also like for all the members to discuss the invites with the leader who're online at that time. Mostly because there might be a chance that someone in the guild knows this guy from before and knows something about this person that the inviter doesn't. (He might be a ninja-looter or whatever.) Of course, there are people in the guild who don't like this system - they think it's too "bossy" and they might be right. I might be a terrible control-freak! But the fact still stands - it's a )&"(/)O#/ good guild!
I just realised that I feel terribly sad about the people who read this and don't play WoW... sorry for all the WoW-stuff! I just had to get it out of my system!
Darkspear-EU for the win! (<--- Oh, my God... talk about pathetic... such a childish behaviour. I think I have to go away now.)
/Ajöken sa Löken
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